nammamane

Watch Savi with her “toys”.

Stranger Anxiety is hitting my little one big time. Isn’t it too early for that? What does a 6 month old understand? Yeah right!

It did not take very long for us to realize that we need to come up with a survival kit for friends and family that come home. We had to or very soon we are bound to be devoid of any social life whatsoever.

So, all ye who cometh, please arm yourself with these and you might survive the screaming horror.

1. Dogs: Bring a dog or two. Or a cat. She loves them. She will love you.

2. Your cell phone: If you cannot rent a dog, make sure you bring your cell phone (what is it with kids and phones!!). The cell phone does not guarantee you the length and quality of time that a dog/cat would, but you can get by. She loves them …the buttons on your phone. I *think* she prefers a flip phone ;)

3. A Tag Blanket: Don’t even worry about bringing a toy for her, cause it is really the tag she cares about. Tela from WMAG discovered Taggies - a toy company. Don’t go out an buy a Taggie toy either, just any thing with a tag will do.

4. Your acting skills: Barring the physical props, I have noticed that singing/dancing/acting skills go a long way. Exaggeration is the name of the game. Do learn up some nursery rhymes. She has a wide range she recognizes but the spider song is her favorite.

5. A bottle of wine: This is really for the hardworking and sleep deprived parents ;). Assuming you are a incredible hit with my little one, the dad and I will enjoy a little relaxation, while you “enjoy” our little one.

Please come home. You are welcome any time!

Sara of the Juggle asks her readers: Would different choices earlier have made your juggle (managing career+family) easier?

Besides being informed, I am not sure anything else would have made my Juggle easier.
I have not heard anyone say, “I did 1,2,3,4 and 5 …and really, my childrearing has been such a breeze!”.

I am not so sure. I am not even sure that the question Sara asks makes much sense at all.

Here is why …

I really think it is the choices that I now, AFTER I have started my juggle, that have the power to make all the difference. It is the little things. It is about making decisions that let you enjoy your “today” and your babies, dogs and spouses that make all the difference. It is all about realizing where to draw the line. It is about accepting the fact that you are not a superhuman.
EVERYONE can juggle, but is everyone a super juggler? Is everyone with a seemingly super juggling act actually happy and content?

After all, it is not about the juggle …it is about enjoying life and sooner or later the juggle will take care of itself.

If there is anything called a “New Mom Syndrome”, I think I have certainly fallen prey to it. Alas, I am like every other new mom although it has taken me a few months to accept it ;). In my past life (before-baby as in BB), I wondered why women who became moms did the things they did. I am now guilty of a number of new-mommyisms myself and here goes my list of confessions:

* I cut my hair. As soon as I was back home from the hospital and could say day apart from night, I went out and cut my hair. That does not mean I know why women who just popped babies do that, however.

* Way too many new moms I have know run marathons. I guess this has to do with trying to clear the chaos in our brains ;). I have always been a yoga kind of person but one morning I woke up and just felt this incredible urge to start running …maybe I will run a 5K or two this year ….

* Turn to food for solace? I rarely ate for comfort before, but now I am always famished, always hungry and can always use some butter and dessert with my meals.

* Okay …I love to talk about my baby. And yes, I do it in the hallway, in the cafeteria, in my office, on the road …even with strangers at the stores and the post office! Yuk!

* I have fallen in love with oatmeal all over again. I am learning that Oatmeal is the only thing that sticks by me, through thick and thin …

* I thought I would die of less sleep and my body and mind would just shrivel and disappear, but my “system has learnt to handle it” …like so many parents told me their systems did when they had their little ones . I am NOT happy about this, though

* I also thought I would die if I did not get my retail therapy at least once every 2 weeks. Strangely, I am very alive and kicking …the fact that I dress like a mess is another story ;)

* This one hurts ;) …but I have got to admit that I look at baby pictures at work.

I can go on less sleep but I really need to curl up now …

Later Gator!

Three months before my little one was born, I bought the Baby Einstein 20 DVD set on Ebay. I was so convinced that I would need them. There was no reasoning really. Just that I had “heard” a lot about them. I did not question myself much at all.

Out pops my baby and something happens…I start to question EVERYTHING.

E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. I hear that having babies does this to us ( amongst other things ;))

And so, I questioned Einstein. Baby Einstein.
I questioned it quietly though …within the confines of my brain and my home. I did not want to engage in any debate before I had the Einstein experience myself. I watched a couple of dvds and had Savi watch them too. She just stared. She was mildly captivated. She did not coo or laugh when she watched them. It did not seem like a big deal. I was secretly relieved …;)

As the weeks pass, my little one is less and less interested in the Baby Einstein dvds. (Oh no! she is not going to be a genius ;)). She loves watching the dogs and the cat instead. She bursts into laughter when the dogs get close to her. She is all smiles when I enact her nursery rhymes ….

So, I had forgotten all Baby Einstein until I talked about it with a friend a couple of nights back. I googled all around and found a pretty thorough article on the Mothering website. It is a great read. While(unlike the author Ann) I am not set one way or the other about my kids watching TV, I do believe that my child does not yet need to watch TV since there is plenty she can learn just by interacting with us on a daily basis. I have no justifiable NEED for Baby Einstein.

So for now, I choose to shelve the Baby Einstein DVDs. But I would like to hear from folk who think their babies actually benefited in definite ways from watching these DVDs and why? I wonder if there is a way to give my little one the minimum amount of time with Einstein to make sure that she will be a “well-rounded genius” ?? Okay, that is an oxymoron …but you know what I mean ;)
Or do people out there think I should shelve these DVDs forever and forget they even existed???

It has happened too many times for it to be a coincidence anymore. Way too many times.

Almost every milestone that Savi has reached was first reached when she lay butt naked on the bathroom floor (don’t you worry, there is a playmat under her butt). Is there a hidden lesson here?

Couple of nights back, Savi finally rolled over from her back to on to her tummy for the first time. And then, in the next half hour, she had done it at least ten more times. Watching her made it seem obvious that her bare bottom had a hand in it … I wish someone was there to watch ! ( I am telling you there wasn’t anyone else …just in case you comeback and ask for proof ;) …except Lucky …but then, cats are big liars :)) . It seemed like she needed to put the technique into action just once and then it was all about perfecting it.

I suggest all we parents do a little research study here …give all newborns some “bare butt time” everyday and then track their development. We might actually see that they reach some physical milestones sooner merely because we are not tasking them with doing things in their lives, for the very first time, wearing what seems to be a space suite around their already somewhat chubby bottoms ;). Seems obvious when I word it that way, doesn’t it ?

Bottom line.? Savi is going to have a lot of “bare butt time” going forth…since I am fairly convinced that I have a point here. She might have a bone to pick with me when she gets older ….but then, she’ll have plenty of those and hopefully I will have learnt how to deal with her by then ;)

Now that we do more than just lying around, the weekends are getting more “active”. With it being the coldest weekend of the season so far, it has been up to mother goose (yes, that’s me) to get creative and figure out what all this “little person” can do over the weekend.

Now, you have got to remember that unlike babies, “little people” don’t get fooled. You cannot make fleeting baby sounds and get away with it. These activities have gotto be the REAL STUFF.

So these are what I came up with …and the reasons I think they work.

1. Fold the laundry: Put the washed and dried clothes about 5 feet from baby. Fold them high up in the air. If possible wave them around making different shapes in the air. Narrate what you are doing at every step.
Pros:
- Laundry gets folded ;)
- Hopefully, “folding laundry” gets wired into the baby circuitry and your child will willingly do/fold her laundry for the rest of her life ;)
- Improvising and adding activities such as Peek-a-Boo into this activity is extremely easy
- Clean clothes can double up as teethers
Cons:
- It does not work unless you narrate every single step …animated is even better ;)
- You have to be ready to face reality …If it absolutely does not work, it could imply that your wardrobe sucks ;)

2. Read the Sunday Paper: Pile up Sunday ads on your side. Put baby on your lap,facing forward. Read one ad at a time.
Pros:
- You get your window shopping done
- You save money and learn to tell yourself that you are just so happy to be fitting into your old clothes that you really don’t need any new ones.
- Baby reads the newspaper …you might be instilling a great habit in your baby ;)
- Ads are bright and the paper crackles … babies love that
Cons:
- Colorful ads do NOT double up as teethers
- The house is a big mess …it is a lot harder to recycle little bits of paper strewn allover the bed/floor.
- You do not have the luxury to check any ad i any greater detail since stopping for more than 10 seconds on a page might really irritate the baby.

3. Dance to the music (baby music and nursery rhymes, that is):
Pros:
- Your daily workout!
- I would love to think that babies get a sense of rythm when you do things like this ;)
Cons:
- Itsy Bitsy Spider???? C’mon!
- Things like this might kill the little social skills or social life you have left ;)

4. Pet the pets
Pros:
- You come to remember that the animals walking around in the house used to be your babies at one point.
- You throw your touch-and-feel baby books away.
- They love this activity - baby, cat, dogs and all!
Cons:
- Tufts of hair in little baby hands? Hmm, not good!
- You throw your touch-and-feel baby books!

5. Check email

6. Watch the news on TV

7. Stare baby in face

5,6 and 7 are really not recommended. Seriously. While they might work, guilt is almost a sure side-effect ;)

Any fun activities I can add to this? Do let me know :)

All of us at nammamane want to wish you a happy and safe New Year. We had a very memorable and eventful end of the year. Mayu’s parents and six other members of her family were on the coast of Sri Lanka vacationing when the Tsunami hit. They and all of us (the family) went through a rough few days but all of them have survived with minor cuts and bruises. Myna and Pramod did come over for a week during Christmas. We drove to meet family in Illinois and Iowa. Pranam and Mahesh also joined us for the New Year celebrations. Generally I had a really good 3 weeks of vacation
:)
If you haven’t already done so, please donate something f or the Tsunami victims.

Recently Mayu participated in the Columbus Heart Walk 2004 and dedicated it to her “Pappa”. She collected about 300$ for the American Heart Association. Her co-workers from her previous job (Qwest) had set up a team and collected about 3k, which is pretty good.