nammamane

We put some new pictures on flickr. Check it out!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/pkolari/

All of us at the Kolari-Bisineer household would like to invite you over.
The Event: Nothing Special
Time: Anyday, Anytime
There is no need to RSVP. Please just come on over. Please …

If I do not sound desperate yet, let me tell you very clearly that I am extremely desperate to have you over. Please come so we can all have a good time I can get a break from my little monster.
I will cook for you get you pizza and you can enjoy in the backyard play with my dogs.

Just in case your imagination is running wild, let me reassure you that you won’t notice a thing when you come over….casue you will make ALL the difference. There is nothing wrong with our household, or I would like to think so. It is only that the latest member of our family is in love with “people”. All of a sudden she is terribly in love with people.
Savi is just a social butterfly. She needs people. She does prefer talkers though. Thanks to my cousin’s wedding we attended the past weekend, we have affirmed all of these facts. She is happiest left alone as long as she has people to watch. You don’t have to talk to her …she will talk with you as long as you are talking.

So do come home. Life is just more fun for everyone that way and perhaps you will get a break from your cooking for a day!

This is the story…

The wonderful wonderful homebased daycare provider we have for Savi is quitting in September. She says she is “sick of dirty diapers” and is “done with babies”. I really appreciate that she is quitting though, since that is what is best for both her and us. She has given us plently of notice too, which is just wonderful. “I can shop around and find the best daycare for my daughter”, I thought. Little did I remember that waitlists in the best places run a year and a half at least, at a very minimum! (Please do remember that if you are in the business of making babies ;))

Thankfully, we have a spot in one pretty good daycare. Clean place, caring teachers and all that. Savi will be going into the 12 - 18 months room (infant room 2), where kids are expected to “feed themselves”. No bottles, just sippy cups. The kids preferably know how to use the spoon and the fork. I got a sample menu and all the rules and policies.

From that day I learnt their “rules”, I sit Savi down on her high chair and let her “feed herself”. At 10 months, I should say she is doing amazingly well. She not only feeds herself but she will also feed the dogs and the cat ;). She loves touching her food and even manages to get about 20% (that is a lot, believe me!) of the food into her system. It is all very adorable to watch and messy to clean ;).

Ah yes, even that endless sippy cup experiment has ended somewhat with one kind of sippy cup Savi does not mind. Honestly, this sippy isn’t very different from a bottle (soft spout) …but hey, I think that will be in line with the daycare policy ;)

Savi loves all this ofcourse. Feel the food. Feed mama. Feed papa. Feed Iris. Feed Charlie. Totally totally oblivious to all the pressure the mom feels …the stress, acidity and my ulcers when I see that on some days that even 10% of the food does not make it into her….

And then I wonder …in a couple of months I see myself shoving food down Savi’s throat before I drop her off to daycare. I will be thinking about doing the same when I pick her back up…I will be obsessed with Savi and her eating. Oh, how scary! And then I think that all this is totally crazy!! She is 10 months old! Which sane person would expect a 10 month old to feed herself 3 full meals a day? Is this a policy that promotes “more independence” in a child or “less work” for a daycare teacher? And then some people try to convince me that kids will indeed eat when they sit down and see other kids doing the same. I got to see that to believe it!

I am sure I did not feed myself at one. Heck, I still have problems feeding myself on some days!

I am confused. Confused as hell! Honestly, I am concerned.

I know from friends and sisters who have had their share of “poor eaters” that thinking about the child and his/her eating can be an exhausting and draining task. Thankfully, my little one has never been that way ….but am I setting myself up for a whole lot of stress and worry in the eating department?

I could even be making too much of this. Kids these days are so smart. Sure, they can feed themselves at one! I was born a looong time ago and humans have evolved since then ….the fact that I did not feed myself at one is not even a relevant concern ;).

Okay folk, I can use some guidance on this one :) ….I could drive myself crazy thinking about this!

You got it. She is all about pleasing her Pa-pa.

Ofcourse, she says pa-pa-pa with great ease and is yet to say ma, let alone ma-ma.

Papa not only can feed/bathe her, he is also so much more fun! Her “bonding” with the dad begins with the naughtiest smile. SHe will then run towards him, climb onto him (no matter how is he standing or sitting) and then roll all over, bend, climb, hug and so on and so forth. Apparently, she is trying to imitate his style of expressing affection (holding her upside down, throwing her up in the air, rolling on the floor).

Rest assured that “mama” is quite happy. It seems like the dogs have started treating me as a person once more. They will sit by me, sleep by me and ask me to protect them when Savi starts to chase them. And as much as she likes her pa-pa, the little one will walk up to me from time to time and give me a gentle hug and a wet kiss (on the nose!).

And this is exactly why I get to go out with friends on a Friday evening while dad takes care of the little one.

It is all sooo good !!

Well, yes, I am “Out of Bloffice”.
I take a peek in every now and then but until I graduate with my MBA(in June), I figure that blogging will have to take a back seat.

Mostly because I do not have any other movable parts in my life. Savi is still very much the center of our lives. She wakes up and starts to do new things every day. I am still amazed! She started to crawl like a pro last evening - super fast and a perfect technique. We are having to be creative and make “cruising tracks (furniture tracks)” for her all over the house, since that is her new favorite activity.

The dogs have still not tried to eat Savi and I still love them. With the weather starting to get better, I certainly prefer walking the dogs to blogging in the little free time that we have as a family.

I am also starting to get involved in The Power of Onesie. In keeping with my promise, I am starting to work in that direction. And honestly, this seems to be more important than blogging ;)

I cannot wait to be back! I will try to sneak in once in a while and let you know if I am up to something phenomenal …

Tata!

The “Department of Homeland Sanity” has issued a sleep deprivation alert. The quiet terror of sleep deprivation is starting to have irreversible effects in the “mother”land. The Department hopes that by defining deprivation levels and issuing alerts, the nation will be more prepared to handle an unforeseen attack in the near future.

LOW : I am not very sure why this level even exists. Parents, by definition, are always on this level. “LOW” sleep deprivation implies you are having the best time of your life. You cannot do much better than this.

GUARDED : At this level of sleep deprivation, you are mildly troubled. This is when you forget to take your wallet to the store. Or your stylish hobo handbag to work. You may socialize, but do so cautiously.

ELEVATED : Now, you are getting into the danger zone. At this point you are getting rather unfit to socialize. I suggest you keep away from folk unless they are sleep deprived parents themselves …in which case they won’t know any better ;). Normal human beings will repeatedly ask you if you are okay when you are in an “ELEVATED” state. Ignore them since they mean no harm. You have bigger things to worry about from this point on ….

HIGH : Not good. Not good. Try to do everything possible to prevent yourself from getting here. At this point you are not getting more than an hour of sleep in one stretch. You are going on less than 3 hours sleep every night for at least 4 nights in a row. Not at all good. You tend to wonder where your office is. You consistently walk out into the wrong floor at work. If you are anything like me, you will hold your key to your door and hope the door opens (much like holding your work badge to the sensor).

SEVERE : You are delirious. You are almost dangerous. You are unfit to take care of your child. You will probably cry at the drop of a hat. Your marriage could be in trouble. Your spouse does not know you, your dogs don’t recognize you… What the heck! You don’t know yourself anymore. I suggest you take a sick day at work.

What level are you at today? Any fond memories of sleep deprivation?

Watch Savi with her “toys”.

I’d be lying if I say that I was not worried about how our doggies would react to the new baby. The dogs had been our babies so far and I could not imagine that a new human baby would come into our lives. I had heard that whether we like it or not (of course, we would like it ;)), the new baby would soon become the center of our lives (owing mainly to the fact that the baby would be totally dependent on us for every single thing for the next so many years). The side effect? Doggies (no, not the cat) would go lower in the totem pole. And stay there. It hurt in the pits of my stomach.

While the dogs have done great with the baby since the day she was born, there was something amiss. I could not say what. In dog terms, I thought that perhaps we were all still not part of the same “pack” . Perhaps I was right….

I had heard about the benefits of having animals while bringing up babies. Kids that have grown up around pets tend to have lesser allergies (look at me..I cannot even fake an allergy ;)). They end up being more tolerant, compassionate and considerate (look at me ;)…alright, not the tolerant bit :)). It will be a while before I can test these theories with my own little one, so I paid little attention to them. As of a few months back, I really did not see how the pets+kids combo did much else besides generate more work ;)

But NOW it is a whole new story. Sorry, but I have to gloat. Life has been so much fun the past few weeks (barring the sleep deprivation, of course), I just HAVE TO talk about it.

Savi will laugh loud and happy when she sees the doggies (and the cat). She loves it when we carry her and run with the dogs in the back yard. She has figured out the she can roll all around from one dog to the other when she is on the floor of the great room. She will “talk” to them since she has figured that they “respond” to her. Charlie very often comes and sits right by her too. Iris, he crazy one, will bring her tennis ball and put it in front of her. Lucky (the cat) will come by and rub his head against her hand …and she will promptly respond by holding his ears and trying to eat him ;) … ( I know what you folk without pets are thinking ;) …NO, we folk with pets really do not let our babies EAT our animals ..so you rest easy there !)

It has been just six months since we had Savi and we are back to being a family again …sitting around together, eating together and playing together. Very soon, we will be going on walks together (will spring ever be here ???).

One happy family …just bigger but back in action!

Stranger Anxiety is hitting my little one big time. Isn’t it too early for that? What does a 6 month old understand? Yeah right!

It did not take very long for us to realize that we need to come up with a survival kit for friends and family that come home. We had to or very soon we are bound to be devoid of any social life whatsoever.

So, all ye who cometh, please arm yourself with these and you might survive the screaming horror.

1. Dogs: Bring a dog or two. Or a cat. She loves them. She will love you.

2. Your cell phone: If you cannot rent a dog, make sure you bring your cell phone (what is it with kids and phones!!). The cell phone does not guarantee you the length and quality of time that a dog/cat would, but you can get by. She loves them …the buttons on your phone. I *think* she prefers a flip phone ;)

3. A Tag Blanket: Don’t even worry about bringing a toy for her, cause it is really the tag she cares about. Tela from WMAG discovered Taggies - a toy company. Don’t go out an buy a Taggie toy either, just any thing with a tag will do.

4. Your acting skills: Barring the physical props, I have noticed that singing/dancing/acting skills go a long way. Exaggeration is the name of the game. Do learn up some nursery rhymes. She has a wide range she recognizes but the spider song is her favorite.

5. A bottle of wine: This is really for the hardworking and sleep deprived parents ;). Assuming you are a incredible hit with my little one, the dad and I will enjoy a little relaxation, while you “enjoy” our little one.

Please come home. You are welcome any time!

Sara of the Juggle asks her readers: Would different choices earlier have made your juggle (managing career+family) easier?

Besides being informed, I am not sure anything else would have made my Juggle easier.
I have not heard anyone say, “I did 1,2,3,4 and 5 …and really, my childrearing has been such a breeze!”.

I am not so sure. I am not even sure that the question Sara asks makes much sense at all.

Here is why …

I really think it is the choices that I now, AFTER I have started my juggle, that have the power to make all the difference. It is the little things. It is about making decisions that let you enjoy your “today” and your babies, dogs and spouses that make all the difference. It is all about realizing where to draw the line. It is about accepting the fact that you are not a superhuman.
EVERYONE can juggle, but is everyone a super juggler? Is everyone with a seemingly super juggling act actually happy and content?

After all, it is not about the juggle …it is about enjoying life and sooner or later the juggle will take care of itself.